Today

Today, is a beautiful day. This bridge I'm sitting on affords a amazing view of the park and it's pond. I love these kind of places, I love the serenity they offer.

Today, however I'm having trouble finding peace. Even as I lay across the wooden boards to glance at the sky. Its a comforting, soft blue, appropriate for the month as its like staring into my aquamarine engagement ring.

As twilight approaches, fewer clouds linger in the sky. But the ones that do are a pillowy white streaked with hot pink.

The cold breeze is blowing ripples in the brownish-green water. Today, I feel like the pond. Like every turbulent ripple is an emotion I can't name or handle.

Today, I should feel better. At least to some extent because I'm not going to lose my heart. But I feel as though I already have. 

They say the eyes are the windows the the soul. And the ones I love to loose myself in no longer reflect what they once did. 

My anger gave way to deviation. I find in order to get back even some of our previous normalcy I will have to set aside my pride and insecurities. 

That is something I'm prepared to do, but I can't help but wonder if it's already to late.

Maybe I'm getting ahead of myself, maybe I just need to give it time. But as I tell myself that, my heart nags at me. I just get the feeling that time will not be enough. I just can't help but worry, that my love will not be enough...